Maternity Leave

So much going on right now, so much joy. I will be taking Maternity Leave from Marrying a Medical Student. Please feel free to follow us on our baby blog.

But be warned, you might be tempted to lick your screen - my baby is just delicious.

Will you vote for us?

Pretty please? Click below.

Falic Friday

OMG please go over to Heir to Blair and read this HILARIOUS guest post about.. well..

It's dirty and there are some really HOT tips.

If you have some extra time, read the comments. I laughed almost as hard.

Hard.

That's what she said.

I'll show you mine if you show me yours

Apparently today to National Delurker Day. Yes people, I said NATIONAL. And since I got y'all hot and bothered with thoughts of my hubs elephant weenie dance I figured what better time for a coming out party?! COME OUT OF THE CLOSET! Not to mention comments send me on a TOTAL HIGH for the rest of the day, I liken it to snorting crushed up dark chocolate after binging on spicy Thai noodles and cheap cabernet. Melts in your nose not in your hand.

Anyway, regardless of whether your expose yourself today (tomorrow, ANY DAY REALLY) or not, thanks for reading my blog. It's nice to think I'm not the only one who does it.

Have a Jolly Holly Day

via design*sponge

My hubs and I were so thankful to make it home from the hospital last Friday just in time to light candles for the last night of Chanukah. Next year, we'll be lighting them as a family and my heart flutters at the very thought!

I will be laying here eating THE MOST DE-LISH-ISH CHOCOLATES EVER (sea salt!?) and blogging intermittently next week, but for updates on my pregnancy please visit our baby blog or click on the owl in the sidebar.

Have a wonderful holiday season my dear readers. I hope each of you are blessed with good health and cheer this weekend and always!

This owl is so cute you could just eat him up!

One of my new year's resolutions was to buy a fancy banner for my blog. Instead, I decided to MAKE a (er, uh) fancy banner for my blog AND my parenting blog. I know, I'm all "Look a me and my thrify, talented self!" Modesty is a learned behavior people.

BUT! I did decide to break down and have the wonderful Shelly at Pixie Dust Sprinkles make me a blog button for the baby blog. Mostly because the Top Mommy Blog website requires you to have a fancy looking button to entice people to click on your craziness and read about how big your boobs are getting.



I think it's adorable and only reinforces my obsession with owls.



Also, I've stayed true to two more resolutions as well - handwriting notes to my friends and buying handmade holiday gifts. Let's just say my credit card statement has a lot of Etsy on it this month.

I'm famous AGAIN!

I had one of my nursery questions posted this afternoon on my favorite design website Ohdeeoh!

I'm so excited and I am already swooning over the suggestions!!

CHECK IT OUT HERE!!

I'm famous! Now will somebody bring me some mint water?

Happy weekend friends! I'm busy getting ready to watch the OSU vs. Michigan game (GO BUCKS!)

Pam Beesly: Yeah! I love being on the road, but I especially love the time-and-a-half pay, twenty-four hours a day for three days. 'Cause, I have a mortgage now! Gotta bring home the bucks!

Michael Scott: Yea-oh don't say BUCKS, that's not lady-like.

ALSO, I was honored to blog over at Our Little Apartment today. Ashley rocks so hard and we're both Ohio girls so it was so nice of her to let me share my crazy over in her neck of the woods.

Check me out!

Seriously - go do it.

Also, GO BUCKS!

Two blogs are harder than one

It is hard to think about things to blog about for ONE blog - let alone TWO! I promised myself I would not bombard my readers with blah, blah, pregnancy crap. HOWEVER, it turns out, when you're actually pregnant - it's all you can think about!

That aforementioned crap is spewed over at Please Send Parenting Books, which if you are so inclined, can find by clicking on the cute little bird in my sidebar. Except for Jennie!, because Jennie thinks babies are assholes.

So I figured tomorrow I will do a My Favorite Things post - because I haven't done one in a while. And that leaves today. Well, today I wanted to send some shout outs.

Congratulations to MERMANDA! She got hitched to her perfect merman last weekend. WOOT! WOOT! She was a beautiful bride and I CANNOT WAIT to see more pictures and hear all about it once she's done shagging her brains out in Mexico.

Here we find her in a bathroom stall with a bridesmaid up her dress. Isn't she gorgeous? (sweetheart necklines make me ::swoon::)


And, my good friend E gave birth (NATURALLY! GOLD STAR FOR E!) to her second baby yesterday! (remember her red-headed daughter Miss Z whom I ADORE) Welcome Amelia Lindsay, good luck trying to get your sister to share her goldfish crackers!



And lastly, a huge HOLL-AH! to my Hubs. Because he is amazingly awesome and has 18 residency interviews already and is that much closer to actually having an income. YAY!!

The Summer I fell in love with Jesus

I know, I know, you're thinking the title of this post is my release from the bonds of Judaism after Brit tried to join the tribe yesterday. But no, rest assured, I still love matzo ball soup. This post is brought to you courtesy of 20 Something Bloggers BLOG SWAP. It was a perfect match, as we both heart theater and poop jokes! Be sure to check out my "Summer Memories" post over at i fall down alot

Please give a big [lots of comments] welcome to IRIS!

I consider myself to be agnostic, yet I love, love, love Godspell. I don't know quite why. Maybe it's the hand-clapping. Maybe it's the juice given out at intermission. Maybe it's the goofy golly-gee-ness of it all. Or maybe it's because one summer I fell in love with Jesus.

No, this is not a story about how I became a Christian. While I have nothing against Jesus--I think he's a pretty wonderful guy--this is actually a story about how I fell in love with a boy playing Jesus in a summer stock production of Godspell.

I'd been working as an usher at Timberlake Playhouse that summer, which meant I passed out programs, led people to their seats, and then watched the show for free. This was my perfect job, except for the whole no paycheck thing.

Godspell was the opening show of the season, and I was allowed to watch the final dress rehearsal since before the season began I'd spent an entire afternoon sweeping away leaves and shoveling dead raccoons out of the actors' cabins. Allowing me to watch a dress rehearsal was the least they could do. Well, they could have offered to pay for a rabies shot, but I was fourteen and in love with theater and I was unaware of the dangers of dead raccoons, so I didn't press the issue.

And after they discovered I was a trumpet player, they asked if they could borrow mine for the part of the production when John the Baptist blows the shofar to get everyone to shut up and come to order. Or at least that's what the director told me. I had no idea what he was talking about, other than the fact that something I owned was going to be used on stage, which I found incredibly exciting (dork alert).

So that's how I came to be watching the dress rehearsal of a show I knew nothing about except for the fact that some dude was going to spit into my trumpet. As you may or may not know, show begins with the Prologue, or, the tower of Babel song. I was incredibly fascinated by the slow layering of melodies and the intricate shapes the actors formed as they sang, much like the movement of a marching band spelling out the name of the football team. I was a huge klutz (still am) so watching people sing and move at the same time blew my mind.

Then my big moment--my trumpet was played, and shortly thereafter, Jesus made his big entrance with his first song, "Save the People."

I was filled with a decidedly unholy, yet innocent, longing for Jesus as soon as he appeared, and that longing increased the longer he sang. Jesus was played by a boy around eighteen, with curly blond hair and a cherubic face, replete with a sweet persimmon of a mouth. His costume emphasized the light and brightness of his character: a pair of overalls that started orange near the bottom of the legs and faded up to yellow at the top of the bib. I believe his shoes were yellow chuck taylors. When he sang those words, "Flowers of thy heart, O God, are they," I wanted to be the flower of his heart, this beautiful boy with the clear, pure voice and big eyes.

Immediately in love, I was intensely jealous of the actress who sang "Day by Day", with her innocent flirtation with Jesus; I wanted to be her, singing to him. During "Turn Back, O' Man," when the girl who sang that song flirted with Jesus in a decidedly un-innocent way, I was equally horrified and envious. During "By My Side," as she, this stand-in for me, this girl I wanted to be so I could be close to the object of my affection, sang: "Oh please, take me with you/ Let me skip the road with you/ I can dare myself/ I'll put a pebble in my shoe/ And watch me walk/ I can walk", I had a new understanding of love-- of the pain that you will gladly suffer at times to be with the one you love. In my young life, I'd had an idea of love that I'd culled from movies and television shows, none of which had explored the painful, darker side of love--the shadows you sometimes must walk through to get to the light.

The second act began with Jesus being wheeled in inside a wheelbarrow, and he sang the song "Beautiful City", an undisputed ballad. When he sang that we could build a beautiful city, I imagined that he was singing to me, and the beautiful city would be a perfect place where he and I would live together in perfect, blissful happiness (remember, I was fourteen, a completely besotted schoolgirl).

The rest of the summer I was thrilled any time I saw the actor--Michael--who'd played Jesus. I watched the other shows he was in, but none of the roles he played impressed me as much as his Jesus. I never acted on my love for him...I was only fourteen, with terribly low self-esteem, so I just loved him unrequitedly from afar, as I'd done so many times before and since. Even though we never even talked, I still would like to thank him for teaching the young girl that I was quite a bit about love, loss, and yes, how to dance and sing at the same time.

Thank you, nice Jesus. For everything.

Would you rather have a husband or a lifetime supply of ice cream?

This post is a part of 20SB’s Looking Back Blog Carnival, and Ben & Jerry’s is awarding free ice cream to lucky bloggers and readers! (man, do I heart ice cream!)
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I started this blog as a way to document the wedding planning process (ie. how much it sucked) and to vent about my partner being a medical student. Granted, I thought blogging was SOUP-ER stupid until I read my friend Jennie's nonsensical mess that is her brain splatting randomness onto the internet. But inevitably, I was jealous and figured I needed in on the action. This is my corner.

I have come to adore my blog and have found it provides a creative and organized outlet for my thoughts. I've also met some totally cool chicks/dudes and one girl who thinks she's a mermaid.

This is the perfect time to look back. Next weekend fireworks will fly honoring one year of wedded BLISS for husband and I. ONE YEAR PEOPLE! I cannot wait to pull that ratty cake up out of the freezer and dig in to it's expired goodness in honor of our love.

By looking back at my blog, I realized that I have always been looking forward. Husband and I have made it through some pretty tough times with this whole medical school thing, and even though residency looms in our future, for now, we spend our weekends enjoying each other. Throughout this blog I find myself looking forward to the amazing life that my husband and I share together. And it all began when he got down on one knee two years ago today and fumbled through the most adorable proposal I could ever have imagined.
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February 11, 2008

I was totally robbed of the intrinsically relaxing sigh that comes from within when you finally reach the week-end. Actually the term weekend now generates a cognitive dissonance that I've never had before. It used to give me that warm melty feeling of sleeping in or lying on the couch or possibly going to dinner and a movie with my fiance(FI) and then staying up until 230am talking and laughing in bed.

It now feels like just another two days. Two days in which FI will be locked in the basement of a stale library shoving information in his brain at an inhumane pace, only stopping to eat meals - which usually need to be prepared by me at a certain time - then off again to basement hell. I on the other hand have the opportunity to get up at 8am on Saturday and teach cycling at the gym. After my sweat session I will go home, shower, and either sit around wishing I was hanging out with FI, beg one of my friends who also don’t have a life to hang out with me or I can run all of the errands we don’t have time to do during the week. Not fun stuff either, mundane stuff like pick up the dry cleaning, depositing checks in the ATM or ordering flower girl charms. My most unfavorite of such aforementioned crap-tasks has been returning stuff left over from the blessed 12/25 without a receipt. I then proceed to read the Internets for three hours and go to bed. Sunrise on Sunday finds me driving downtown to teach Hebrew to little nosepickers.

Now that the backside of the work week is a total enigma, I must escape to my happy dreams where we are married, FI is finally a doctor, our kids are of legal drinking age and after spending Monday thru Friday on a beach in the Caribbean, we are off to Vegas for the weekend. TGIF.. no, let's try TGI2032
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My husband is my very best prize, and we'll fill our weekends with kisses and ice cream whether I win a blogging contest or not.

Five things.

meme courtesy of Mermanda via Brandy. Because I'm lazy.

I can
Bike 20 miles without breaking a sweat
Do my job and do it well
Find awesome deals
Talk for hours
Sing

I won’t
Watch John & Kate plus 8
Apologize for my strong will
Eat cheese on my salad
Get another tattoo
Cut my hair

I will
Find curtains with yellow print for the guest room
Go to Mexico and not think about work
Work on my career goals
Clean out my car
Read more

I should
Keep my mouth shut when I’m mad
Love on my cat more
Exercise EVERY day
Study for the GRE
Be thankful

I shouldn’t
Go out for ice cream so much
Contemplate stealing babies
Stalk people on Facebook
Produce so much garbage
Hate on republicans

According to my husband, I'm only mildly amusing

This week on The Collective they are responding to a random, oddly numbered, survey that was probably posted on MySpice or something like that. I have no motivation to think up a witty, charming, uDDerly hilarious post for you to feast on this afternoon so by default you get, well, this.

ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?

I have a scar on the inside of my ankle from where I dropped a window fan on it in college. Every time my husband sees it we have this conversation.

Husband: Where did you get that scar?

Me: I’ve told you seventy zillion times.

Husband: Oh. I forget again.

2. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?

I can’t tell you, but if you’re sitting near my cubical at 11:11 you might hear me whisper it in a wish.

3. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?

Sometime during the day or night.

4. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD?

Um. THESE.

5. THE BEST TV SHOW EVER CREATED:

This question makes me feel yucky - it's too big and exclusive. I guess Big Bang Theory but if you would have asked me ten years ago I would have said 90210

6. THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO?

an annoying cycling instructor

7. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK?

Am I alone? Then, yes.

8. THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY?

My(crazy)self

9. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE?

None, they are in heaven with my tonsils and my gallbladder.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOGNE / PERFUME?

Currently, Miss Cheri by Dior or Michael Kors Island
But 16 years ago it was Sunflowers or Loves Baby Soft, am I right ladies?

11. WHAT KIND OF HAIR/EYE COLOR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?

Hair and eyes are overrated.

12. WOULD YOU RATHER BE SMART OR FUNNY?

I’m brilliant AND hilarious so it’s hard for me to judge those lesser than I.

13. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINKS?

I haven’t consumed caffeine in over three years.

14. IF YOU COULD EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?

An entire NY pizza – extra crispy, extra cheese. I’ve never even eaten three pieces, but a girl can dream

15. WHO IS THE LAST PERSON YOU MADE MAD?

Probably my dad, but I'm pissed at him anyway so, seriously, whatever. I want to punch him in the face.

16. DO YOU SPEAK ANOTHER LANGUAGE?

No. But I teach Hebrew to 3rd graders – go figure!

17. DO YOU LIKE SOMEONE?

I am obsessed with Taye Diggs, but I have no idea if I’d like him.

18. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING?

Isn’t everyone we love leaving at some point?

19. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?

Don’t throw away their nasty boxer briefs no matter how many shreds and holes they have in the crotch.

20. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?

Feeling like I’m waiting for my real life to begin.

21. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE U.S.?

Canada, Mexico, England, Caribbean and the District of Columbia

22. YOUR WEAKNESSES?

Sales, hot nerds and neck kisses.

23. IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE?

One day I might want new boobies. I would also like to NEVER wax my eyebrows again.

24. WHY DID YOU FILL OUT THIS SURVEY?

Because I suck at being original and like to kype other people's prompts.

25. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?

In college, I called up this smokin' hot football player from my organic chemistry class and told him I wanted to sleep with him.

26. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST?

My hair from other people, my boobs from my husband. Because if everyone complimented my boobs it would just get weird.

27. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ALCOHOL BECAME ILLEGAL?

Probably have to research it when people start using it intravenously.

28. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?

“Children are a heritage of the Lord…We let the Lord decide”
– The Duggars and the creepy people from this NPR story

29. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?

An inkling my mom had when I was about to bust out of her uterus.

30. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?

Two Sunday’s ago on our way to Walmart which prompted husband to pull the car over in the parking lot of a tractor supply store to slap some sense into me. Thankfully, it worked and we didn't have to buy a tractor.

31. ANY BAD HABITS?

I quit biting my nails a month before I got engaged. I love to smoke, but don't. And I curse a lot but have no shitting idea how to stop.

32. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?

If I were another person who listens to conservative talk radio, hates cats and sews my own clothing – then no. Otherwise, sure, I’m a blast!

33. DO YOU KNOW ANYONE FAMOUS?

I see Dave Chappelle almost every time I go to Yellow Springs. The last time, I was eating outside and he STARED AT ME while passing by on his skateboard wearing a wife-beater tee. Here people are doing everything in their power NOT TO STARE AT HIM, and HE STARED AT ME. Unfair. Stop it Dave! So I decided the next time I see him, I am staring. True. Story.

so did Jennie

34. DO LOOKS MATTER?

In modeling but apparently not prostitution.

35. HOW DO YOU RELEASE YOUR ANGER?

Cycling – although I hear snorting crush Xanax(R) works like a charm. I also punch people in the face a lot.

36. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
I’m gullible as hell, it’s a genetic trait I inherited from my mom.

Me: You never listen to a thing I say!

Husband: What?

Me: I SAID, YOU NEVER LIS…

Husband: {laughing}

Me: I want to punch you in the face.

37. FAVORITE THOUGHT PROVOKING SONG:

"Front Porch Looking In" by Lonestar

(no, I don't heart country - but this one, I like)

38. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?

My birthday. Hands down. My birthday.

39. FAVORITE EXPRESSION?

I KNOW, right?

Subtle hints didn't work

I love to share my blog with the internets and in turn make friends and learn things about people. I have been enamoured with the blogging community and it's role in today's media and societal relations and am thrilled to be a part of it.

That being said, I think there is a limit to what we is shared and read on the internet. For some time now there have been hits on my sidebar from Thailand. I love that my blog has international readership but those hits have become increasingly frequent and include multiple searches for things like "sex". If you are looking for material like that, you have come to the wrong place and are not welcome as part of this readership.

I understand blogging is a public forum and in turn need to decide how I would like to proceed.

Should I password protect my blog and make it harder for people who are actually connected with me to read my thoughts in an effort to limit someone who is spending entirely too much time on my blog and searching for inappropriate things?

Should I make a "no perverts" pact with my readers?

Should I stop blogging all together and go back to writing in my pink Hello Kitty journal from the sixth grade?

Any comments/suggestions/thoughts would be great. Particularly from Bankok, Krung Thep.

The word gas is not technically on the box - it's implied

I'm thinking about blogging again after my brief hiatus. But thinking and doing are two totally different things. So while I am off thinking of how to tell you about all of the things I've seen and done over the past few weeks: Seahorses, wedding and a bazillion airports - there is ONE pressing issue that I really wanted to share with you.

Remember how I told you about those yummy fart bars?

Turns out there is a warning on the box, albeit subtle, not to eat more than one.

These bars are unbelievably delicious. You may be tempted to eat the whole box in one sitting, but we don't recommend it because you will damn near fart your butthole off. Gradually increasing fiber into your diet over time is a better idea and your digestive tract and coworkers will thank you. Plus, you'll have another bar to look forward to tomorrow.

True. Story.

If you're a stalker, please leave a message. BEEP!

Thoughts for TA-day:

I'm glad my husband doesn't smell like cheese

I'm glad my husband isn't the kind of medical student who kills people

I'm glad my husband bought me that SLR camera because I think photography is awesome!

Also, Skyping with my husband is an incredible turn on...even when he's in the next room :)

Thoughts for TA-morrow:

I will be taking a short break from blogger for a while. Maybe two weeks - maybe a day, but definitely longer than a day. Probably. I hope.

I've noticed my blog traffic has picked up lately (yay!) - yet my comments have not (boo!) I would like to invite all of you shy stalker people out there to leave a message. I always like to meet new people and read interesting blogs. Perhaps you have one of your own? Also, you can see from the map in the sidebar there has even been some INTERNATIONAL traffic. Whuzup witchoo?


(photo, Busted Tees)

Holla Back? Aight?

Seacrest.Out.

Fine! Don't be my friends! I'll buy new friends! Yeah, and then I'll pay for their plastic surgery so they'd look just like you!

Today, I've decided to up the *SPICY* factor on this little piece of the internets. Behold, this post is a double cherry-POP as my friend Heidi (sometimes spelled Hidi at Penn Station) blogs for the first time (welcome to the internets friend!) This momentus day also marks the first ever MARRYING A MEDICAL STUDENT GUEST POST! All I can say is wow, that was a lot of firsts.

This was the topic I enticed her with:

I would appoint her my #1 bestest friend in the universe if she would only...

Now, I introduce...Heidi!

Tamara asked me to guest post today for her and she threw a topic out at me that I find myself answering frequently when I play this game with myself. Here is my rationale:

My bestest friend in the whole universe...

would have the ability to spot a designer tag, in my size at any Plato's Closet, consignment shop or Goodwill in town.

She would be able to speed read books for me and then tell me what they say.

She would come to work and tell off my boss for me.

She would also posses super-human strength so that if there were a car in the slow lane she could swoop in (oh yeah, she can also fly), pick their car up, let me pass through, and then put them back down.

She would also be able to help me find a great boyfriend and weed out all of the losers for me.

So what does my bestest friend in the universe look like you ask? Well, I think it's a pretty standard girl rule that you MUST have a token "fat" or "ugly" friend so that when you're out with her, guys think you're hot(TER). I know this might sound bad, but you know you have/wish you had/are that girl in your friend circle.

Therefore, my bestest friend in the whole universe would posses everything I said above and look like THIS (donut included) ---->

If I win the Dream Home I will never read US Weekly again, I promis.

Did you know most people abandon their resolutions by the end of January! January people? Why bother? I, on the other hand, like to work on myself all year long. It ebbs and flows with my mood but I have made some definite progress on my lofty resolution list for 2009.

1. Delete my MySpace account

2. Spend way too much money on a fancy brunch

3. Bake an apple pie

4. Register everyday for the HGTV dream home (contest ends 2/19/09)

5. Go to a BINGO night

6. Pay off my Discover card

7. Donate books to a vagina charity

8. Study for the GRE

9. Get an ‘A’ in my biostatistics course

10. See a sports medicine doctor for my knee

11. Organize my CDs

12. Play more Wii

13. Go to a wine tasting

14. Snuggle

15. Know Shabbat prayers from memory

16. Get new carpet

17. Keep up with current events

18. Switch to biodegradable cleaning products

19. Wear shimmery lip gloss

20. Have something published

21. Give someone a second chance

22. Dance with my husband

23. Be on time for something

24. Organize my computer area

25. Learn to use iTunes and photo editing software

26. Do 100 push ups

27. Read more books (sTORI Telling) and keep track of them

28. Go on a girls vacation with my friends possibly.to.the.beach

29. Clip coupons

30. Eat more dairy, soy and protein

31. Play ski ball

32. Own a necklace with a sparrow on it

33. Keep a secrete

34. Hand write notes to friends and family

35. Get rid of my mail catalogs

36. Be patient with husband’s schedule

37. Floss more

38. Get a fancy banner for my blog

39. Take the GRE

40. Apply to DrPH programs

41. Think before I speak

42. Frame some wedding photos

43. Paint my nails navy blue

44. Win something

45. Give handmade holiday gifts

46. Ski

47. hang out with my mom

48. Have my veil preserved

49. Wean myself off of Us Weekly

50. Use more lotion

So according to my math brain, I should be tackling 4.666(repeating) resolutions PER MONTH. March is over like tomorrow, so I'm about ten behind. But at least I managed to cross off six of the things on my list.

I haven't once missed MySpace, I spend most of my free time writing on people's wallpaper and talking about all of the things I heart.

I registered for the Dream Home and I cannot wait until HGTV pulls up in my driveway to tell me #44 can be crossed off with the acquisition of my new home in Sonoma County, California.

I switched to Method(R) cleaning products after a friend of mine did an extensive comparison and voted the mint cleaners superior. Now I don't feel like I'm about to pass out when I'm cleaning the shower, because the fumes are all natural.

My *best* accomplishment is BY FAR my A IN STATS! I really pulled it out there at the end with the take-home final, especially since I totally bombed the mid term. This was a special victory for me. (BTW I still have no idea how to do statistics, so please don't ask me)

My second best accomplishment was my Santa Fe presentation and trip I took with my mom - now that was a lot of time to spend with your mom!

I was on time for TWO lunches with friends this weekend and on time (hour early) to my presentation in New Mexico. Those totally count.

Works in progress:

I'm working on #30 and added chocolate soy milk in addition to my soy yogurt.

#35, it a vicious cycle. I went online to unsubscribe to catalogs and now I am getting different catalogs! Frick!...work in progress...

#42 I finally ordered our wedding album and some prints - AND I bought the frames. So this is also very close to being completed.

#44 I thought with my Louisville pick, I might just win my basketball pool BUT since those nim rods went and lost yesterday - I have to hold out for the Dream Home.

#48 I put my veil in a pillow case last night, in preparation to bring it to the preservation place. I will do this.

#19 I am SOOOO behind on my magazine reading. I have 4 US weekly, 3 Redbook, and 2 Marie Clair (9 copies of Working Mother?!) magazines sitting in my living room waiting to be read. Latest US Weekly features Reese Witherspoon in on the cover and I must know the dish about her and Jake. I'm not sure if this resolution is possible, but I'll keep trying...

I'm working on the Discover Card (this will take time people) and holding out that my husband will initiate either the brunch, the wine tasting or the Bingo... I wonder what I'm getting for my bday...19 days, hope the suspense doesn't kill you.

Overall, I am very proud of my accomplishments to date. How are you doing with yours? Slack-UH-LACK-AHS!

Please leave a message after the beep

Dear loyal reader(s)

I cannot come to the blog right now because I am having my assk handed to me by life. The stress is eating at my insides as if I swallowed a million tape worms and their babies. New Mexico, work, presentation, STATS FINAL, packing, dirty house, travel, AH! AH! AH! Can’t eat. Can’t sleep and I’m having a hard time being nice to people or caring about anything that anyone tells me (and unlike some people, this is abnormal for me).

It’s times like these when I realize that

A) I rarely use my brain these days and when I do it’s like starting up a rusty chain saw – still sharp but you might get tetanus if you get too close.

B) I handle stress worse with age

C) I know exactly why people snort Xanax. Honest to blog I thought about it this morning.

I am taking a break from my blog (unless I run into Taye Diggs in New Mexico and then I will totally brag about it on my blog the very second after we are done making out) until I get back.

If you stop by to see if I am back yet, leave me a message. I like when people do that. AND you can pray that the stress of my mildly eventful life doesn’t kill me.

Also: I saw a cute quote last night: “Good girls keep diaries…bad girls have blogs!”

Also: The Macy’s fine jewelry department is going out of business and everything is 60%-70% off with an additional 20% if you use your beloved red credit card. I saved some of my Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanza money and with it, I’m buying myself a pearl necklace. Today. After work. Right after I check my belly button for tape worm babies.

Also: BEEP!

It's tea, sip it and work the pinkie finger

One billion years ago I had nothing to blog about so gave a proverbial shout out to my loyal reader(s) (you) for topics/questions. No one cared. Well, that’s not true. Mermanda cared and offered up a question that I have chosen to answer today, due to a lack of anything else interesting going on in my life. I am getting a haircut tonight and my eyebrows are channeling Jennifer Connelly. They need attention.

She writes: What is your favorite thing to order at a bar?

Since I rarely go to bars, because I am a lame wify now and my eyes get sleepy around 9:30pm and seeing as though 9:30pm is entirely too early to hit a bar, bar – I usually limit myself to places that sell food and contain a bar. Isn’t it funny how the HAPPY in HAPPY HOUR changes when you get older? My happy USED to be drink specials, but now my hour is happier if it includes “1/2 price appetizers.” Lame and cheap are my pleasures. I’ve replaced drunk with a fat ass. Happy indeed.

There are certain things that make me absolutely giddy when I crack open a menu. I can get *VERY* excited over simple things like food (and snow caps). Husband swears it’s because I’m crazy but I bet deep down he thinks it’s endearing.

Cider on draft

Deep fried mushrooms (although husband doesn’t like them so I rarely order this)

Hoegaarden (although I’ll settle for Blue Moon draft)

Cabbage rolls (shut up.)

Crème brulee

Fish and chips (only if vinegar is available for dipping!)

Pomtini’s

german potato salad

Chocolate chip French toast

Caffeine free diet coke (Panera/Macaroni Grill/Chick-fil-a – You complete me.)

Tomato Basil Bisque

Miso soup

Currently, I’m on a salmon kick also salads with calamata olives and anything drenched in Jack Daniel’s glaze.

In addition, anytime I see a formal tea menu, I *Squeeee* with delight (inwardly, so not to embarrass the husband). Tea menus brings back one of my favorite memories from our engagement trip. We were in Victoria British Columbia and we found THIS lovely place (in THIS lovely book). I cannot possibly explain how magical it is. The lady photographed on the homepage laughs like a bowl full of jelly. It’s perfect. I can see the stacks of tiny cakes and sandwiches (tiny food = awesome) and can almost taste the warm passion fruit tea. Can you see the snuggly on the tea pot?


I have a tiny glass teapot on my desk to remind me of it. Mine looks like the one in the bottom left of the picture but it is blue. My boss tried to touch it one time and I said, "Put that down" and he said, "Why, what is it?" and I said, "Something that, if broken, would leave me no choice but to kill you." So he put it down but not before saying that he wanted one. Good luck with that. Don't touch my desk.