Tuesday, October 28, 2008

If grandma says it's playgirl than it is.

True. Story. Something are so funny you just have to be there. Sunday brought one of those moments that comedians couldn’t think of in their wildest dreams, nor could they recreate.

They can’t recreate all of the instances husband and I have insinuated that my brother is gay.

They can’t recreate the innocence that is my grandmother.

They can’t recreate the atrocious sight of my brother’s bathroom littered with shower scum and trashy periodicals.

But I can try to recreate the laughter that came from the bottom of our bellies during dinner.

Party of Seven: Mom, Dad, Grandma, Grandpa, Husband, brother and gorgeously attractive wife (me!). Proud family sits down to dinner at a round table in the back corner of Macaroni Grill. Brother opens graduation cards as we await our appetizer.

Brother: Thanks for the checks everyone, I needed the funds!
Grandma: Speaking of checks, you should keep better track of them, there is a check in the bathroom.
Brother: What?
Grandma: In your Playgirl magazines.
My mom: What Mom?
Grandma: Well I was thumbing through the magazines looking for something that I could read, and in between the Playgirl pages I saw a check for $122.00. You should take that out of there, if that stack of magazines goes in the garbage – you’ll be out a check.
[husband and I are practically on the floor dying]
Me: Grandma, don’t you mean PlayBOY?
Grandma: Oh no, I saw PlayGIRLS.
Husband: [tears streaming] Oh my god, this is funny for SO MANY reasons.
Brother: Grandma, there aren’t any PlayGIRLS in there – they are PlayBOY. Play...BOY! I forgot about that check though – I must have opened up my mail in there. Thanks for reminding me.
Grandma: Playboy, Playgirl whatever. Just don’t go losing a check!

{in Grams defense, I am sure because she saw naked girls she assumed the name was Play GIRL - IT IS confusing when you actually think about it}

Can you see my 85 year old grandma flipping through my brother’s nudie magazines while dropping the kids off at the pool?

Brother keeping stacks of porn in the bathroom of my parents house = classy
Vision of Grandma, knickers down, hoping for a Good Housekeeping amongst stacks of naked = hilarious
Grandma inadvertently implying that my brother looks at gay porn = PRICELESS

1 comment:

Heidi said...

LOL, this is the best story ever!