Be Right Back

The morning sun wakes up the birds
My heavy eyelids begin to stir

The alarm sounds off at the seventh hour
I wipe away the sleep to see Matt Lauer

The bed is soft and hugs me in it
My bladder won’t wait one more minute

I wash my hair and toes and hips
My cat waits for some shower drips

I wrap my hair up like a snail
And head to the office to check my mail

I read the internets and update Face book
Then head to the kitchen to find something to cook

I eat some eggs and bacon at the table
then pack a lunch and wash the dishes if I’m able

Off to the bedroom to blow dry and dress
Picking out clothing makes my bedroom a mess

I rush around to finish getting pretty
I grab my cell phone and kiss goodbye to my kitty

With my purse and gym bag, I head for the car
It’s a good thing my office is not very far

I pull up in the lot just after nine thirty
Lock my car and off to my desk I scurry

But the moral, my lovelies, is more of a warning
For those of you that rush in the morning

No matter how much you look at your watch
You should always, always...


glance down at your crotch.